tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post8846304279074539481..comments2023-10-15T04:14:11.505-07:00Comments on FORESTER: Foresterhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13252666368088857269noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post-47991120093913819242007-04-25T07:44:00.000-07:002007-04-25T07:44:00.000-07:00Forrester, I don't know that I've read your blog b...Forrester, I don't know that I've read your blog before, but it seems really honest and I enjoyed reading your words.<BR/><BR/>Depression is a beast, I wish you the best of luck in figuring out how to live and work through it. I have been in and out of counseling for depression and a variety of other issues over the years. My father has clinical depression and his brother has a horrible case of manic depression. My mother, brother, and sister have also been on anti-depressants in the past. I am no stranger to the world of counseling and depression. As for me, I don't know that marriage will ever work simply because I don't know that I'd ever find a woman who would take me and I'd be too afraid of getting a divorce later on. Anyway, I'm not here to talk about marriage. I believe you when you say that you don't feel trapped in your marriage and beliefs. These are things that truly bring a measure of happiness to your life. You do mention that you have guilty feelings about your attractions, yet you also acknowledge that you didn't ask for these feelings. You also say that you don't live a dichotomous life, but I can't help but feel that having that kind of conflict leads to dichotomous thinking. "I hate these feelings I have because they conflict with what I want and something that brings me joy and they could potentially hurt those that I love." Yet at the same time you feel guilt or shame. Guilt is a feeling reserved for things that ARE our fault.<BR/><BR/>So my question for you in all of this is, do you think that maybe part your depression comes from a dislike for yourself because you have these feelings? Like something that just built up over time and suddenly it became something that is a dominating presence? Like years of smoking that suddenly lead to a cancer? I ask this because that is how I felt for a very long time. I used to hate myself and I didn't even realize it. I hated that I had these feelings. Loving yourself unconditionally doesn't mean giving into these feelings or accepting a gay lifestyle as something you'll pursue, but rather loving yourself as God loves you, the flawed human that he made. For me, that made all the difference in understanding God's love for me and helping me to be happy.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, I really enjoyed reading your posts here. Thanks.<BR/><BR/>-CaspianDistinguishing Preoccupationhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03595180957813663545noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post-12170459524202932952007-03-26T09:04:00.000-07:002007-03-26T09:04:00.000-07:00If anyone really believes clinical, diagnosed majo...If anyone really believes clinical, diagnosed major depression or bipolar disorder are caused by SGA or vice versa, they are simply wrong. Both of those diseases are caused by a lack or excess of certain chemicals in the brain, much like diabetics have too much glucose in their blood. <BR/><BR/>There is a very unfortunate stigma about mental illness. I've had people tell me to "snap out of it." Of, if only I could, when I'm depressed. If only I could remain in my mildly manic states, where I have wonderful energy and great ideas and am so happy and full of life. If I was a diabetic, people would be understanding.<BR/><BR/>But I am who I am, and I didn't choose to have bipolar disorder, just like many of you aren't depressed because you are SGA. Anyone with a diagnosis of depression or any other related illness from a medical professional didn't bring it upon themselves because of their personal incongruity of being SGA and having a testimony of the gospel. You can't give yourself cancer from it; how can you give yourself major depression from it?SGhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05418779785748125429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post-12794545601674925802007-03-26T08:28:00.000-07:002007-03-26T08:28:00.000-07:00As another person who suffers from clinical depres...As another person who suffers from clinical depression, I too feel that my SSA did not cause my depression. It may exasperate it, but I don't believe it was the root cause.<BR/><BR/>After going to a variety of doctors a few years ago, the best they could come up with was that I was <I>biologically predisposed</I> for depression.Abelard Enigmahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13166049686152203530noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post-13473516449096226352007-03-25T22:39:00.000-07:002007-03-25T22:39:00.000-07:00That's a really interesting post. I have lived wi...That's a really interesting post. I have lived with depression for probably 10 years now. I always thought that it was because I have SSA, but I am beginning to think that something else is going on. I'm beginning to see that the two issues are not one and the same, though they are linked. I don't believe that being Mormon and gay means that I am suicidally depressed. It certainly makes it harder at times, but I believe that there is more going on (at least with me) than meets the eye.Craighttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09374110841642375968noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31006111.post-29825061170628500322007-03-25T22:32:00.000-07:002007-03-25T22:32:00.000-07:00I think we're all glad to hear you're getting help...I think we're all glad to hear you're getting help, Forester. Your posts were making me worry about you!<BR/><BR/>Good point about the stigma of mental illness. It's sad it exists and it's sad people fear it more than the disease.playasinmarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05998841658611428960noreply@blogger.com